Episode Ratings Grid

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Episode Power Rankings

The peaks and the valleys. Find the essential episodes — and the ones to skip.

#1
S3E3 9.1
Speed 3

Ted and Dougal turn detective to discover who's behind the bumper crop of hairy babies on Craggy Island. However when justice is done on the culprit he takes a terrible revenge. Dougal's moonlighting stint as island milkman is marred by a bomb set to go off if the milk float drops below 4mph. Does 'The Poseidon Adventure' hold the key to his rescue, or would Father Jack's pet brick come in more useful?

#2
S3E1 8.9
Are You Right There Father Ted?

Ted finally escapes to a new posting at Castlelawn Parochial House, Dublin, with civilised company and frequent jaunts to Paris. Unfortunately a slight misunderstanding over some expenses sends Ted back to his old compadres on the island. After a spot of lads' housecleaning results in Ted being mistakenly tarred as a racist, Ted holds a celebration of Chinese culture to clear his name - though 'Kung Fu Fighting' may not have been an inspired choice of soundtrack. Just when it looks like a happy ending might be in store, a mix-up over some soft furnishings and Nazi memorabilia leaves the Chinese community with a sweet 'n' sour taste in the mouth.

#3
S3E6 8.9
Kicking Bishop Brennan up the Arse

A lost bet with Dick Byrne means Ted has to kick Bishop Brennan up the arse. On cue, Len arrives with PA Father Jessup, the world's most sarcastic priest. Elaborate preparations, a camera, a skirting board, a set of watercolours and some psychological warfare on Ted's part ensure a successful outcome. Or do they?

#4 A Christmassy Ted S2E11 8.8
#5 Hell S2E1 8.6
#6 A Song for Europe S2E5 8.6
#7 Tentacles of Doom S2E3 8.5
#8 Flight into Terror S2E10 8.5
#9 The Mainland S3E4 8.5
#10 Cigarettes and Alcohol and Rollerblading S2E8 8.4

Lowlights

#25 S2E7 Rock a Hula Ted 7.7

Ted is asked to compere the 'Lovely Girls' competition while Dougal is left in charge of the house. Father Jack is mistaken for Bob Geldof and Dougal manages to give the house away to a feminist rock star called Niamh Connolly. Ted has to get the house back, but how will this affect his dinner plans with the winner of the 'Lovely Girls' competition?

#24 And God Created Woman S1E5 7.8
#23 Entertaining Father Stone S1E2 7.8
#22 Good Luck, Father Ted S1E1 7.8
#21 New Jack City S2E9 7.9

The Quality Arc

Each point is an episode, plotted in order. Colored bands mark season boundaries. Look for the rise, the plateau, or the decline.

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Episode Engagement

High votes + high rating = beloved classic. High votes + low rating = notorious stinker. Low votes + high rating = hidden gem.

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Series Trajectory

One point per season. Smooths out the episode-to-episode noise to reveal the bigger arc.

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Season Momentum

Did each season build or fizzle? Green means the finale outscored the premiere. Red means the opposite. Longer arrows, bigger swings.

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Season Consistency

How steady is each season? Tightly clustered dots mean reliable quality. Scattered dots mean a wild ride.

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